My place of sacrifice

I've been meditating much on 'the altar' and its importance and significance in my life.  The word altar is defined as “a sacred place for sacrifices and gifts offered up to God.”  There is  much tension in the offering given - the difference between a sacrifice and a gift.  The place I continue to find myself going, often longing to stay there sometimes willingly, other times, dragging my feet not knowing what the Lord may be asking of me. 

This sacred place - the altar has been the most pivotal place in my life and my faith walk.  As I look back over my life, I continue to see God's faithfulness to me. Remembering, causing my heart to pause - being thankful for the experiences of ‘the altar’ that have become a doorway for me to learn the importance of laying down my gifts and having a heart willing to sacrifice for my Jesus.

My very first experience with ‘the altar’ was the day my parents stood before their families and the church - dedicating me to the Lord as a baby. They declared and promised publicly to raise me in a home that would teach me about Jesus, how to love him and live my life for him, always! A gift - A sacrifice.

As a child, at ‘the altar’ I remember kneeling and giving my life to Jesus promising to live for him always and love him forever. A gift - A sacrifice.

“The altar” the place as a teenager during summer bible camp where I felt a call into ministry and a desire to serve Jesus and his church with all my heart - regardless of how that might look, or the sacrifices it might require. A gift - A sacrifice.

The spring of 1987 ‘the altar’ the place Tim stood before the Lord and me as he proposed. On bended knee he declared he was choosing me to spend the rest of his life with; and in that moment he shared how ‘the altar’ had always been a sacred place in his faith walk so he wanted to propose to me at ‘the altar’.  A gift - A sacrifice.

August 15th, 1987 standing at ‘the altar’ together we promised our forever together through the good, the bad, in sickness and in health - vowing to love each other - till death us do part. A gift - A sacrifice.

‘The altar’ - where we dedicated our 2 precious children - Ashley & Andrew promising to raise them to love Jesus with their whole hearts.  And then, watching our precious grand babies dedicated to Jesus at ‘the altar’. A gift - A sacrifice.

July 15th, 2018 at ‘the altar’ I gave Tim - my most treasured gift back to Jesus - for all of eternity! And in those moments, I thanked Jesus for this most precious gift he blessed me with for almost 31 years. My greatest gift - My hardest sacrifice.

The altar - such  a sacred place. The place I continue to run too - knowing that as I’m obedient in giving everything to Jesus - hands opened holding nothing back - arms raised in total surrender he continues to work and fashion a beautiful tapestry, a masterpiece out my life. For it's in the gifts I willingly lay down - although it may cost me a great sacrifice - his work in my life as I surrender makes it worth it all.

And, even if - I’m not sure of the plans he has for me, or what my ‘next’ will be  - I will continue to run to ‘the altar’, praying your will - not mine - be done!